Eat a Roach?...Don't make me puke!

Why wait in line when you can just eat a cockroach? That's the question Six Flags Great America is asking its thrill seekers during its Halloween-themed FrightFest. The amusement park is daring customers to eat a live Madagascar hissing cockroach in exchange for unlimited line-jumping privileges.
If you ask me (and I'm aware- for all you smarty pants out there -that you didn't) the daring thing would be getting on a ride next to anyone who would eat a hissing cockroach. Especially before being spun, tumbled, and flipped upside down.

If there's one thing worse than eating a Madagascar hissing cockroach, it's being yacked on by some line-jumping FrightFest Fruitcake hurling chunks of GASTRIC CAECEA ( little sacks inside a cockroach that keep germs and enzymes available to help a cockroach digest its food) in your face!

...I mean think about it~ some Ragin' Cajun ridin', Madagascar eatin' mental midget, blowing chunks of Madagascar MIDGUT (that’s the middle part of the intestine where the cockroach absorbs nutrients so it doesn't explode) all over the enormous novelty hat you just spent $32 to win at the arcade.

Imagine, if you can, the true horror as little Joey, who begged and pleaded with you to ride the Giant Drop, finds himself slathered with giant drops- of vomitous MALPIGHIAN TUBULES (you say malpighian tubules, I say cockroach kidney). Either way, to little Joey, and his newly found lifetime supply of emotional baggage, it's the same thing.

The promotion starts Oct. 7. If you go, watch your back (and your front). BWAHAHAHAH!