2.16.2009

If Cigarettes Cause Dimentia, These Ads Will Make You Insane




GTN New York- A study by the University of Cambridge, Britain's Peninsula Medical School and the University of Michigan published on Feb. 13th in the British Medical Journal links exposure to second hand smoke with an increased risk of dementia, the progressive decline in cognitive function due to damage or disease in the body beyond what might be expected from normal aging.

Gelotology Today discovered several vintage pro-smoking ads and if second hand smoke doesn't drive you mad, these ads might just do the trick.









A brand new idea in smoking-mentholated cigarettes! As the perforated cut out section below promises-nothing tastes more like springtime than a menthol smoke! Whoever penned this gem must have spent springs near a coal burning factory.



Why we wonder, would you want to cut this portion out, unless you need something later to hack up a lung into?
















"He's one of the busiest men in town. While his door may say Office Hours 2-4, he's on call 24 hours a day."

The doctor is a scientist, a diplomat, and a friendly, sympathetic human being all in one, no matter how long and hard his schedule."

"More doctors smoke camels than any other cigarette"

I can imagine the dinner table discussion as this ad was read...

Harold, as long as we're choosing a doctor to treat little Jimmy's asthma, why not choose that one with the ashtray breath that chain-smokes camels?

Sympathetic Human Being? Hey Doc; How 'bout putting that thing out before you treat my open head wound!
















After the drag of a long oceanic expedition hunting new, enigmatic denizens of the deep, nothing is better than the deep drag of a Winston cigarette.

Jill likes to hold hers up in front of her face so she can safely witness the upcoming solar eclipse, while Jacques is devising a plan to convert this newly discovered species of squid into a Winston-burning Turkish water pipe.




















Gather the kids round the fireplace, daddy is going to read this special holiday message from Santa!


Santa: Ho Ho HO! (Ho's added for authenticity)

smoke PALL MALL the cigarette whose mildness you can measure"

Little Timmy on Christmas morn: WOW! Look Ma! Santa came! And he brought me a carton of Pall Malls!


Lucy (also on Christmas morn-for those too demented from second hand smoke to follow along):Santa brought me a 'Mildness Measuring' device and this neat-o puff chart! YAY! Can we measure the mildness mom, PLEASE!












"After careful examination of your teeth, I find them to be way too healthy and white. Just one look at your gum line and it's plain to see, absolutely no receding!

"As your Dentist, I would recommend Viceroys"

"now open up wide...and get ready to enter flavor country"












This, according to Chesterfields' elite 'Flavor Panel':

"Science discovered it- YOU can prove it"

"No unpleasant after-taste "

Ironic that their panel found their cigarettes the winner!

What this study has to do with with a high- powered microscope we are still looking into, but of one thing we are certain: This scientist is not suffering from embarrassing ashtray breath!


So smoke up and tongue-kiss awaaaaaay!















This was our 'Editors Choice' for cutest cancer causing killer ad!



"Gee Dad, you always get
the best of everything
...even
Marlboro !"
"Aww, look Karen-isn't that the cutest thing! Little Kenneth said his first words!!"

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